With such a gorgeous sensual cover, the irresistible temptation of an MMA bad boy; the idea that the heroine might be a strong -take- no- bullshit- character by suggesting her job as a mechanic and the fact that she hales from the Vegas underworld. I was immediately seduced into downloading a sample.
The writing…oh joy!
It’s written in the first person present tense and it’s horrible.
I hate this format, it screams amateur to me. This is where I should have left it alone and just walked away.
That being said I have endured this style in the past and if it is done subtly, with elegance and is pivotal to the telling, I can cope. So against my better judgement I cave and click buy as I am still seduced by the premise of this story.
Stupid, stupid me!
The over use of I
has the same result as nails on a chalk board, but I grind my teeth and persevere with the plot and what I think will be a strong feisty heroine and a mean sexy bad-boy in need of a hammer wielding mechanic to break through his defences.
How wrong could I have been? What follows is a whole lot of insta; insta-attraction, insta-lust, insta-love and insta-bility. There is no relationship development, just a whole lot of possessive animalistic growling from Jonah and blushing from Raven. Ridiculous, especially when this is supposed to be for a mature paying audience. I expect more than that I’m afraid.
It is quickly established that Raven is not the kick-ass-strong-willed heroine I had assumed. She is a twenty year old virgin girl (not a woman!)Who behaves like a 12 year old, she sobs and cry’s over everything!
It is such a constant emotion for her that it garners nothing but my irritation. She blushes like a bloody teenager over one look from Jonah and giggles over the most ridiculous jokes. Her character in relation to her upbringing is just totally implausible to me.
Jonah is supposed to be this hard as ice bachelor who never sleeps with the same woman twice. So having slept with scores of woman I do not expect this experienced man to behave like a teenager at the sight of a lacy bra! Sure, he’s met the woman of his dreams but his insta-capitulation is incredulous. He growls as much as Raven sobs which only leaves me feeling...well, incredulous (again!).
The plot is predictable and its effortless staying steps ahead of these characters and the evolving scheme. Such a pity our MC’s are too tragic to see it.
This has no angst but lots of drama of which I couldn't really give a toss about, especially when the MC’s decide to just accept the situation and not find any other alternative, ultimately trusting a renowned criminal to honour his word. As if! Talk about ignorance.
This has some sweet moments between Raven and Jonah and her upbringing is a harsh one. The authors attempt at creating an empathy with Raven is justifiable, but it does not make up for her other shortcomings.
I predict this will be a hit with the ‘Indie’ readers who don’t mind this structure and are able to suspend disbelief, overlook some editing issues, and prefer reading just for the eye candy that is Jonah and Raven.
Me? I am not impressed.